I Won’t Be Using the Term “Flawless Skin” Anymore – Choosing Skin Health Over Perfection
Can we talk about the term “flawless skin” for a second? That’s what we all want. Or at least that’s what marketers at major cosmetic and beauty brands have told us we want. I mean, I’m sure I’ve used this term at some point in my life. Sounds pretty innocuous right? On second thought, maybe not. Because the more I think about how we talk about skin, (women’s in particular) the more I see the similarities between bodies and fat shaming. Correct me if I’m wrong here (I mean it, I totally could be) but I haven’t seen very many commercials targeting aging men about their wrinkles. Nor have I seen tips in GQ for guys looking for flawless skin.
The reality is, there’s a lot of skin shaming out there. Society shames wrinkles, acne, sun spots, eczema, the list goes on… and on. We obsess about skin’s “flawlessness” and freedom from marks, while rarely obsessing about how amazing it is at protecting our entire body from the outside world. Not to mention “flawless” is a very one-dimensional, genetic dependent, and hard to attain standard on which the beauty industry can make us measure ourselves to and market against.
I want to start challenging how I (and maybe you too) think about, and appreciate our skin. I’ve found myself falling into a similar pattern I started with food and health a long time ago. It started as an innocent quest for “health” and has turned into trying to meet an impossibly difficult standard of “flawlessness.”
My Skin Story
I’m keenly aware of my skin precisely, because it’s not society’s definition of flawless. I’ve had acne since I was a teen and it didn’t magically disappear when I got into my mid twenties. I have it on my back, my jawline and sometimes I’ll breakout in different spots on the middle of my face. When I was in high school, then again after college, I tried medications and applied intense creams. They worked … until I stopped taking the pills every day. They were bandaids.
This year, has been a big turning point in how I take care of my skin. Through personal research, hearing from fellow wellness bloggers and being introduced to Follain as well as some other amazing skincare brands, my eyes were opened to how little the beauty and skincare business is regulated. As a result the products we use and trust are often filled with chemicals that ultimately do more harm than good in order to feed a business model driven by profit margins, not our health. If you’re curious about the beauty industry I highly recommend checking out Davida’s podcast: the Healthy Maven episode 19. She has an incredible interview with Kim Emanuel, Luminance Skincare’s founder/CEO who is so knowledgeable.
Long story short, putting chemicals on are skin is a whole lot like eating them. I never understood quite how absorbent our skin is until now. This year, I’ve made a lot of really positive changes in my skincare routine, mainly actually having one. I’ve also invested in natural products, worked on managing stress and started connecting the dots between food and skin.
Here’s where my skin is at today. This is low average kinda week.
Skin Health Over Skin Perfection
All these things are wonderful, however I’ve noticed myself obsessing over every mark, blaming myself for not “being good enough” and comparing the shit out of myself. A lot like I used to with my body, food and other women’s bodies. While my main driver for better, more natural skincare started as a quest for flawless skin, on this journey I realized that healthy skin was far more important. Realistically, I’ll probably never really have flawless skin (for more than a day or two at a time).
It’s been a bit of a wake up call to realize a lot of the work I’ve done on healing my disordered relationship with food and my body has manifested in some ways with skincare. There is a line between taking care of your skin’s health and expecting your body to be perfect. I’ve had to step back to really see where that line was.
So incase you’re in the same boat, I feel you. Your skin is a beautiful, powerful, amazing part of your body that deserves to be nurtured, loved and celebrated. It’s a wonderful thing to take care of your skin with natural products, nourishing foods, cleansing rituals and plenty of sunscreen.
However, know that just like with the shape of our bodies, we can’t control everything. We don’t have to think our beautifully flawed skin is perfect. We’re still allowed to be annoyed about a pimple or a mark or bump while also holding space to love and appreciate what our skin does for us. And it’s ok to not have a “woke up like this” instagram-perfect mark free face in the morning and still be a damn goddess. I sure as hell don’t.
I love and needed this!! I’ve always struggled with my skin and have never been confident without wearing some sort of light coverage powder foundation (accept for in the summer when I feel my skin gets naturally glowy and clear for a bit!). I totally envy my sister (and anyone else) who has naturally clear, beautiful, and 99% of the time acne free skin.
I have tried harsh prescription creams (which have helped, but then dried, burned, or left my skin looking red). I was on birth control to regulate my periods, and hoping that may also help my skin as a side effect, but nope my skin never seemed to change. I’ve tried many skin care products and some seem to start to help and then my skin is back to how it was or they just don’t seem to help at all!! Still searching for something or some routine to help regulate my skin, but it’s nice to know others are struggling with that too.
I totally agree, I don’t want, and at this point I know I will never have “flawless” skin. I have acne scars on my face, a burn on my leg after accidentally spilling boiled tea on me (lol), scars on my knee from two knee surgeries, and I embrace all the my skin has endured!! BUT, I do want to find something to continue to nourish and help cleanse my face/skin as best as I can. I only wish that finding what works best for YOU was easier!!
Loved this post, so so much! This is one of those things that I wouldn’t have even considered, how culture in pointing to women needing to meet some standard of beauty, this also extends to the elusive ‘flawless skin’. I’ve often felt that pressure of not being [fill in the blank] enough, when it comes to my body, but I didn’t even think about how that standard has made me so self-conscious about my skin too. But you’re so right. Same here, my skin in my mid-twenties is pretty much the same as 10 years ago, and it has been often frustrating, trying so many products that don’t seem to make a big change, and perhaps are actually really bad for our skin. So thanks for this good word of encouragement! Our bodies are amazing, and we shouldn’t forget that. Thanks for sharing!!
Oh my god. This post literally just changed my entire perspective. I’ve struggled with acne for most of the last 8 years, and though I go through phases of being more or less accepting and then REALLY frustrated, I always did have that goal in mind of having perfect “flawless” skin. But then as I was reading what you wrote, it hit me that…why is it so bad to have flaws? I mean flaws are what make us unique and beautiful in our own way, and not all just fabricated perfect copies of each other?
And then your point about disordered body image manifesting itself in skin…woah. It really is SO PARALLEL. I mean, I’ve finally gotten to the point with my body where I know what to do to take care of it, but I don’t attempt to make it something it’s not. I don’t let it consume my life. It should be the same with skin. As long as I’m doing my best to take care of it, and making sure I know what’s going on it, that’s really the best I can do. The rest is kind of up to my personal genetic makeup and certain things outside of my control. Thank you so much for this post, Georgie, you’re wonderful <3
I am right there with you!!! I get the worst hormonal acne on my chin – the deeeeeeep angry kind! And my body did not get the memo when I turned 20. It didn’t get the memo when I turned 25 either! Despite a diet with enough dark green greens to keep a field of rabbits happy – my travel schedule, the poor air quality at home (smoke/ash from wild fires), and stress have wreaked havoc on my skin this summer. So I am rocking the no-make-up look like its my JOB and accepting my skin and body for how they are. Hormonal chin pimples and all;)
Thank you for being so open/honest and always infusing a dose of humor!
This is such an important post!! So beautifully and engagingly written as well. I can definitely see the similarities between the diet industry and companies which advertise their products as routes to some elusive flawless complexion, and just like we shouldn’t eat well/exercise to look a certain way, perfection should never be the main aim of skincare. I used to have suuuuch an intricate skincare routine and would go to extreme lengths with makeup to try and cover up every pimple, but since I’ve stopped not only do I feel happier and more content with myself, but my skin has actually improved!
Thank you so much for sharing and lots of love xo
I love this, so SO much.